This is 30 | Sharing Lessons from my Twenties

Another year has come + gone, and I’m now entering a new DECADE of life…that sounds so odd! Haha. But I can honestly say, I’m excited. I’ve not been scared or nervous as this milestone birthday approached because I’m happy with where I’m at in my life, and the woman I’ve become these last 30 years. That’s not to say there’s not room for growth {far from it, my friends}, but in this moment as I’m writing my thoughts down, I. Am. Content. 

With every passing year comes reflection, and perhaps even more-so when it’s shifting from ‘my 20s’ to ‘oh  – I’m 30 now’, and so on. I wanted to take this moment of self reflection and jot down just a few {of MANY MANY} lessons from my twenties. If not for anyone else, but for me to look back and witness the growth. It’s therapeutic. If any of your gals can relate to these lessons, let me know in the comments! Or if you’ve learned something different about yourself, I’d love to hear that too – love the connection and real conversation these personal posts ensue. So here goes…

{just a few} LESSONS from my TWENTIES

BEING INDEPENDENT

As a first born, and only child until I was 15, I’ve always considered myself to be a very independent lady. I’ve been working since I was 16, always had a job {or 2}, paid my way through college, figured out financial aid/loans on my own every semester, and just did what had to be done to achieve my goals.

However, I’ll admit, while Sterling and I were dating in college we became unhealthily dependent on one another. To the point where I wouldn’t go out with friends if he didn’t want to go out that night. Skipped spring break trips because we both weren’t invited, etc. Thankfully after we graduated, and by the grace of God and the gift of experience and maturity, we both naturally grew out of that. And thank goodness, because I swear that transition helped prepare me for the amount of time we’re currently apart due to work obligations. I’ve learned to tackle issues on my own, and just get it done. Not that I don’t need him {because I do in many ways}, but my twenties brought out a different independence that I was unaware I didn’t previously possess. And that feels great. I’m my own person and have my own life to live. My partner enhances that tremendously {and I never want it any other way}, but it’s good to recognize that independence and embrace it.

EMBRACING DIFFERENCES

Learning to appreciate, and have compassion and understanding for, individuals who are different from me has been an invaluable lesson. I naturally gravitate, and maybe we all do, to people that are similar to me. However, I’ve learned that those that you least expect may just have the biggest impact on your life. Differences can be good. They teach you how to compromise, how to understand, how to empathize, how to shift expectations, and challenge you. That doesn’t mean you’ll like or enjoy all differences, but learning to embrace them and live with them peacefully has been good for me. And so much less draining on my emotional energy.

NOT CARING SO MUCH

Specifically in regards to what people think. As youngsters, we take so much {too much} stock in what others think and say about us. No longer. I’m my own person, with my own thoughts, opinions and convictions. It’s as simple as that. People that ‘get’ you will love you for you, and that’s enough! I don’t have to be best friends with everyone, and that is a-okay.

MAKING OTHERS FEEL SPECIAL

I think I get this from my Momma. Growing up I always saw her doing sweet, kind things for others to make them feel special. Even if it was as small as a freshly baked loaf of bread for a neighbor, or that time she individually wrapped {and numbered} 21 gifts for my 21st. What a sweetie pie, right?! When you’re younger you’re more self absorbed, and don’t look at the world in the same light. When I was 21, I was more focused on making it to my classes on time and maybe what I was wearing for gameday that weekend. My world revolved around my tiny universe. No that I didn’t think of others, but just wasn’t as self aware. Fast forward a few years, and boy has my perspective shifted. I’ve found that the little things go a long way with people, and that’s important. Remembering to write a handwritten thank you, popping a card in the mail for no reason, celebrating my friends’ successes and just being there for them. All of that is so so important to me. I want others to know and feel how much I care about them. You never know how your small act of kindness might impact someone else’s life. So I challenge you {and myself!} to take time out of your busy day to try and make someone else’s a little brighter.

And there you have it – just a few of the MANY {countless, really} lessons from my twenties. I wrote down about 20 more in my journal, but here are some highlights I think we can all relate to. We’re ever changing and evolving, so I’m excited to see what the coming years have in store for me! CHEERS to 30!